Wednesday, September 16, 2009

NonFiction

Okay, this is my first page. It sounds very egotistical right now, but once it is finished, you will get that this not about me having a big head (haha, I promise I don't) because that has nothing to do with the moral of the story.

1. Ooh babeh babeh. Mmmm yeahh. HAH! Raise head in an innocent but totally seductive motion with engaged eyes on camera. Okay, not really, just the reflection of the glass doors in the second floor hallway. Walk, no, skip. Now, bend knees lower. Perfect. Next camera is coming up on the left in the testing center. Quick turn with shocked eyes, loose jaw. Sweet, it’s just like Britney’s music video with these flare pants. I’m a pro! Yes, you’re right, I haven’t done anything outside of school like get an agent or auditioned for anything serious, and I’ve only written half of most of my five songs, no six. No, five. But why worry? I’m going to make it sooner or later; American Idol auditions are coming up and there is no question. I know what people want out of an artist, I know what works, and I will offer that to the world, and they will take it, damn it!

2. Times set aside for practing my Britney imitations that will make me a popstar no matter what, own, unique, completely original popstardomnes that I really have to work hard for:

Pre-calc chapter 2 test this Friday

Standing in line waiting to get some grub

Waiting for Ada to finish up in the bathroom (YAY FOR MIRRORS)

Any time that I am alone in a hallway (YAY FOR GLASS DOORS!)

Doing any homework, besides physics ( I need to take that seriousely). Psh, who am I kidding.

When there is homework to do on Blackboard, in between religiously studying videos on YouTube.

When Lauren rants on about how important it is to unplug the straightener to save energy.

Pretending to care about saving energy when there is a mirror RIGHT THERE!

3. Black and white: on the porch of a cabin out in the Nevada woods. It’s a family reunion talent show. All eyes are on me with sweet, soft smiles. It’s a typical scenario of the youngest, only girl of four kids. I belt out “Give me a siiiiign, hit my baby one more time!” and, of course, the “awww”s and “wow!”s come pouring in. Now cut me some slack…

A. What seven year old girl doesn’t like Britney Spears?

B. What kind of seven year old can imitate her strained, technologically improved voice down to a T?

C. What seven year old girl has the same hair color and has every move in her video memorized flawlessly?

4. I love being here for twelve hours, surrounded by 12,000 nubs that are fighting for the same thing that I live and breathe for, with no sleep the night before and no energy to work on my audition song. I think not. Whatever, I’ll get down there and sing my song and move on. No need to practice my back up song (I’ve been practicing in my head for years). I’ll be fine.

2 comments:

  1. WOW! This rocks! It is sooo creative and hilarious! It does not sound like you have a big head at all! This collage really works! It is quite effective and wants me to keep reading! My favorite part is when you do, "Britney imitations that will make me a popstar no matter what" but crossed out!!! :) That is soooo cool and creative! I am curious to what else you are going to say! Ummm I truthfully have no clue what you can change to improve this.... like really!!! It rocks! OH! You MAY want (sometime in this paper) to add dialogue of you and someone else! OOOH! Idea!!! You could totally do someone complimenting you or by accident calling you Britney Spears... but this is your fantasy. So you could be like, "Hey Britney Spears!!!" Or "Lizzie Spears!" Or something like that! And you could be like, "Why yes???" And be awesome like that... but then be like, oh, that was just my imagination... oops! THIS ROCKS! GREAT JOB!!! -Emily H!

    ReplyDelete
  2. This is great, Lizzy! I really like that you are putting in different styles, like descriptions, A.B.C.'s, and lists! Something really cool would be the idea of having a point of view from your mirror, or you having a pretend interview from Brittney, but she is your biggest fan or something like that! Really good start! I want to hear this! Also, it could be funny if somehow you took some of her lyrics and added them randomly to some section, like this:
    After I came home from school, my mom came barging out of my room and demanded,
    "Lizzy! Your room is a disaster! What do you have to say for yourself?"
    "Oops! I did it again!"
    HAAAA! I love the cross out part, too!

    ReplyDelete